Some people actually go on birdwatching vacations. Other times bird spotting is just part of a trip. Here is an only slightly tongue-in-cheek guide to some types that are often encountered in flight.
The “Nester” — Commonly seen during vacation season. This species has to turn an airline seat into their own private cozy nest. This isn’t a problem per se, until you stand behind them in the aisle trying to board while they pull items to feather their nest out of their carryon bag. Or, if they have to keep getting up during flight to get more stuff. Or, if their nesting material: pillows,blankets etc, spill over into your space.
“Magpies” — These birds just don’t shut up. From takeoff to landing they squawk about anything and nothing. While they can be amusing in small doses, they can become as maddening as vuvuzelas after a relatively short time.
“Seatpeckers” — Apparently related to woodpeckers on some level, these types have the nervous habit of tapping something on their seat with their feet, fingers, a pencil, etc. If the steady monotonous sound doesn’t get you at first, it eventually will. This species is particularly annoying when young, when its parents shrug off the behavior. Adults of the species can often be glared or threatened into submission.
“Hummingbirds” — Like their wild cousins these birds are in constant motion. If the seatbelt sign isn’t turned on, they are often up and about. Which is delightful if you get one of them as a seatmate who spends the entire flight back in the galley or anywhere else on the plane except in their seat. But, maddening if you get the kind that is in-and-out constantly, especially when they have a middle seat or window seat and you are on the aisle.
The “Ravens” aka “Nevermores.” — These birds complain, nonstop, which can be entertaining for up to about half an hour, especially on a delayed flight. These “never agains” get old on a long flight. Unless of course you are so mad at the airline that you also become one of them.
“Lovebirds” — Like a lot of these birds, they are cute in small doses. (“You’re on your honeymoon? How sweet.”) But a cross-country flight of nonstop billing, cooing and “kissy-face,” or worse, can get old in a hurry. Besides, lovebirds on a plane are never as good looking as the ones on the inflight movie.
No doubt Consumer Traveler readers have seen these and other birds on their travels. If you’ve seen a species I haven’t, or have forgotten about, please add it to the comments.
Janice Hough is a California-based travel agent a travel blogger and a part-time comedy writer. A frequent flier herself, she’s been doing battle with airlines, hotels, and other travel companies for over three decades. Besides writing for Travelers United, Janice has a humor blog at Leftcoastsportsbabe.com (Warning, the political and sports humor therein does not represent the views of anyone but herself.)
